Counselling services

Couples Therapy

Repair your relationship with couples counselling.

What is Couples Therapy?

Couples therapy is a practice through which a couples therapist and a couple work together to create a desired change for a relationship.

Couples/marriage therapy is often helpful when couples are struggling or experiencing relationship problems or strain and aren’t sure if they can save the relationship — or want to end it and get a divorce with dignity. It can also be a useful first step if the couple is experiencing a crisis, such as the loss of a child, a job, or an affair.

Couples attend therapy to build skills that can help them strengthen and improve communication and deal with life transitions and various issues, including:

Some couples choose to attend a therapy consultation to gather information that can help them deal with the problems they are facing.

The Difference Between Healthy and Unhealthy Relationships

Healthy relationships:

Unhealthy relationships:

Signs You Should Seek Couples Therapy

There are many signs that can indicate that couples therapy may be helpful for you and your partner. Here are some common ones: 
Therapy can also be a good idea if your partner won’t attend couples therapy with you, but you feel that you need to work on yourself.

Is Couples Therapy Right for You?

Have you found yourself wondering, is couples therapy right for me? Consider some of the following questions to determine whether you might be a good candidate for counselling. 

Get the Help You Need to Rebuild Your Relationship

If you’re seeking out couples counseling, you may be feeling unsure whether you should stay in your relationship. Perhaps you’re feeling
If you’ve tried to solve the issues yourself without success, it may be time to get help.

Our Approach to Couples Therapy in Calgary

Registered psychologist, Melody Evans and her staff of therapists in the Calgary, AB office specialize in relationship issues, including Calgary marriage counselling, counselling for those in committed relationships, and same-sex counselling.
Our marriage counsellors primarily use the Gottman method and EMDR, though they draw on other methods, including structural therapy, cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), emotionally-focused therapy, somatic therapy, and Bowenian therapy.
These methods always fit to the specific needs of the client. There is always a focus on building trust, improving verbal communication, fostering mutual respect, and creating an overall successful relationship with your spouse or partner.

The Gottman Method

Drs. Julie and John Gottman developed the Gottman method, an evidence-based therapy founded on 40 years of scientific research. It focuses on strengthening skills in three domains of a relationship:
This method teaches couples how to create the seven components of a healthy relationship, also known as “The Sound Relationship House”.

01. Build love maps.

Work to improve your friendship and understand your partner’s inner psychology.

02. Share fondness and admiration.

You can do this by showing affection, gaining an understanding of your partner, showing empathy, and engaging in expressions of appreciation and admiration.

03. Turn towards.

Discover how to state your needs. Become aware of attempts to create a connection, relate to one another, and how to respond when your partner feels misunderstood.

04. Have a positive perspective.

Maintain a positive perception of your partner, including problem-solving and repairing the way you communicate and your connection.

05. Manage conflict.

Discover how to manage your physiology during grief, deal with gridlock issues, compromise, and kiss and make up to repair arguments.

06. Make life dreams come true.

Create an atmosphere that encourages each partner to talk openly about hopes, values, and aspirations.

07. Create shared meaning.

Understand important narratives, myths, and metaphors about your relationship. Co-construct shared meaning to guide you through any life circumstance.
Gottman therapy is structured and goal-oriented in hopes of creating a better life for the couple. Interventions are based on empirical data from Dr. Gottman’s studies and research of more than 3,000 couples.
So, what does this mean for you?

We’ll use the Gottman-based approach and technique that works to help you achieve long-term happiness. First, you’ll attend a session as a couple for a couple’s interview. Then, you’ll each attend separately for individual therapy. This helps your relationship therapist assess your dynamic together, but also allows them to understand both sides of your experience as a couple and evaluate necessary relationship problems or concerns.

EMDR Therapy and Couples EMDR Therapy

We integrate EMDR processing while working with couples in conjoint emotionally focused couples therapy, specifically to target the problem that is causing them to trigger one another (over-or-under-reactivity).
These triggers are typically rooted in early attachment injuries and injuries from the couple’s relationship.
The issues may include:
With emotionally focused therapy through EMDR, there is the potential for a deep, mutually productive change experience. When partners witness each other’s couples EMDR processing, it can have a therapeutic effect that helps them become more compassionate, understanding, and attached through a deeper connection.

Get the Help You Need to Rebuild Your Relationship

Healing your relationship will help you and your partner live happier and healthier lives together. Book your next appointment, and relight the spark in your relationship.

Frequently Asked Questions

To help you better understand couples counselling, here are some of our most-asked questions (and answers) about the process.

Yes. Counselling services are considered psychotherapy. Each counsellor at Can’t We Just Get Along Counselling is a trained and licensed therapist, third-party providers will accept their credentials to cover the fees.


We recommend contacting your insurance provider to confirm how much your benefit plan covers.

Since the needs of each couple vary, it’s difficult to give an exact timeline. With that being said, couples who are working on building communication skills typically attend counselling every two weeks for about three months. Issues, concerns, and pain of a great need, such as infidelity, tend to take longer.

Any change—even good change—can sometimes cause secondary losses and gains. Therapeutic interventions and treatment will produce positive and negative side effects.


Some couples report improvement after simply making the counselling appointment. This is a phenomenon called “pre-counselling change,” whereby just knowing that you’re going to counselling can improve things. Other couples report positive changes after the first session.

Negative side effects from counselling can include experiencing uncomfortable feelings and emotions as you talk about the issues concerning you. Your counsellor will be there to assist you and is trained in various strategies to address these side effects.

After treatment, almost 90% of clients say they’ve seen progress in their emotional health and nearly two-thirds report improvement in their overall physical health. Over 75% of those receiving relationship/marriage counselling or family counselling report an improvement in their relationships.

When a child is identified as a stressor in relationships, parents report that their child’s behaviour improved in 73.7% of cases. Outcomes show that parents get along with other children better and children’s school performance increases.

Yes. System theory asserts that one person can change a system. Sometimes, one partner going to counselling will motivate the other to attend as they begin to see positive and effective changes. If your partner never attends, you know you’ve done all you can on your side of the fence.

Sometimes, you won’t know if your marriage can be fixed unless you try. Couples therapy—including using the Gottman method—is so helpful.


If you’re unsure what to do with your marriage, considering a divorce/separation, or want to assess the strengths and weaknesses of your relationship, we recommend that you complete an online assessment from the Gottman Institute. This clinical research tool consists of 337 questions and your answers are completely confidential and fully compliant with HIPAA. Here’s how it works:


  1. Accept the email invitation—your relationship therapist will do the Enhanced Gottman Relationship Checkup
  2. Create a private profile
  3. Complete the questionnaire
  4. Get your results

Your couples therapist will contact and discuss the results with you and suggest a treatment plan for improving and strengthening your relationship based on your scores and the analysis of your relationship in hopes of creating a more fulfilling life for you and your partner.